I am a big fan of Thanksgiving. I love getting together with family, watching football, and eating myself into oblivion. There's no major preparation, usually no fighting, and the afternoon is spent by sleeping off 3+ pounds of food. What's not to like? And the icing on the cake is my birthday is around Turkey Day, so everyone is nice to me!
But..
I absolutely hate Christmas or the holiday season or whatever you want to call it. It is an over-sized production put on by corporate America that sucks happiness via the vacuum created by the empty space in the wallets of the middle class. But that's not the only reason...
Music
Radio stations in Northeast Mississippi must have a deal with Santa because these nerds start playing Christmas music before Thanksgiving! Hey, big man--can I at least enjoy my holiday before you start shoving joy and cheer down my throat? I don't want to hear cheesy Christmas songs performed by Justin Bieber or a slew of country artists. I will let Mariah Carey's "All I Want for Christmas is You" slide, though. She's got some pipes. I realize that I am of the minority being a "Holiday Hater", but can we either mix up Christmas songs with a few non-holiday jams or start playing this crap in December rather than mid November?
Shopping
My sister is not a big fan of Christmas either. We had a discussion about it over the Thanksgiving table, and she said, "No part of the Christmas spirit means running over an old lady in the Target parking lot to get your kid's toy at half-price." And I can't agree more. This holiday is supposed to be about giving and loving our neighbors and all that jazz, and it has turned into a newspaper full of articles about shoppers being pepper-sprayed or tazered or getting weaves ripped out.
Decorations
Christmas decorations are the worst. No, I take that back. All decorations are the worst. What's the point of putting all that garb up to only take it down one month later? I see none. And don't try to feed me that garbage about "Oh! They put you into the spirit of the holidays. They make everyone happy." They don't make me happy. They clutter my home and run up the electric bill. And until you have to put up decorations for Christmas at Midway, you'll never fully know my hatred. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED working at the marina, but decorating the grounds was not my favorite part.
The holiday season does have a positive. This is the most charitable time of the year in America. Charities receive millions of dollars of donations during the months of November and December that help provide food, clothing, and gifts for families all over the world. However, all too often this generosity is overshadowed by greed and marketing.
Until we can give up the hustle and bustle of holiday shopping and decorating our houses and lawns like the runways of JFK and be content with food, family, friends, and free-giving, I will continue to be a Scrooge.
Bah humbug.
Check these out:
Operation Christmas Child
http://www.samaritanspurse.org/index.php/OCC/
Salvation Army
https://donate.salvationarmyusa.org/sslpage.aspx?pid=206
Feed the Children
http://www.feedthechildren.org/
Twilight Wish
http://www.twilightwish.org/
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Thursday, November 24, 2011
It's My Birthday
Several months ago, I promised Courtney Simmons that I would blog about my ultimate birthday... because we share the same birth date (along with Miley Cyrus, Snooki from Jersey Shore, and my roommate).
I am not a liar, Courtney. Here ya go.
I don't think I could ever dream or imagine a better birthday celebration than the one I experienced yesterday. Justin Bieber gave me a free concert on the Today Show, WITH USHER, especially for my birthday. I woke up at 7:15 to baby sit my best friend's nephew. Although the kid did have two screaming fits that lasted a total time of about 45 minutes, it wasn't all that bad. Even after all of the tension of trying to settle him down and feed him and all that jazz, it was an amazing feeling to have his little body crash when I was rocking him to sleep. I totally understand why women do it.
But I will never.
After feeling motherly and accomplished, I went home to an empty house. I nuked some homemade veggie soup and curled up to a DVR'd episode of The Closer. I had put my electric blanket on my bed the night before, so I turned that baby on, flipped on some back-to-back Law & Order*, and crawled in the bed for a little siesta. And the siesta lasted four hours...until it was time for a little fellowship with my church family.
The night was topped off with a little watching of Beetlejuice with Mother and Father Tucker. We had some popcorn and laughs, and it was the perfect ending to a perfect day.
I want to thank everyone for all of the birthday wishes that were sent my way yesterday. As you can see, it was absolutely perfect.
Oh, and happy thanksgiving!
*One episode was all about DA Jack McCoy, who is my favorite character; the other episode featured former DA Abbie Carmichael, my second favorite character.
I am not a liar, Courtney. Here ya go.
I don't think I could ever dream or imagine a better birthday celebration than the one I experienced yesterday. Justin Bieber gave me a free concert on the Today Show, WITH USHER, especially for my birthday. I woke up at 7:15 to baby sit my best friend's nephew. Although the kid did have two screaming fits that lasted a total time of about 45 minutes, it wasn't all that bad. Even after all of the tension of trying to settle him down and feed him and all that jazz, it was an amazing feeling to have his little body crash when I was rocking him to sleep. I totally understand why women do it.
But I will never.
After feeling motherly and accomplished, I went home to an empty house. I nuked some homemade veggie soup and curled up to a DVR'd episode of The Closer. I had put my electric blanket on my bed the night before, so I turned that baby on, flipped on some back-to-back Law & Order*, and crawled in the bed for a little siesta. And the siesta lasted four hours...until it was time for a little fellowship with my church family.
The night was topped off with a little watching of Beetlejuice with Mother and Father Tucker. We had some popcorn and laughs, and it was the perfect ending to a perfect day.
I want to thank everyone for all of the birthday wishes that were sent my way yesterday. As you can see, it was absolutely perfect.
Oh, and happy thanksgiving!
*One episode was all about DA Jack McCoy, who is my favorite character; the other episode featured former DA Abbie Carmichael, my second favorite character.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Breaking Yawn: Part 1
I hope this doesn't damage my street cred any more than my serenade of Justin Bieber songs did: I watched the Twilight movie. And I was not disappointed. It was equally as mediocre as I had imagined. The acting was poor; the 25 minute story-line was stretched 92 minutes too long, and Jacob only took his shirt off once. However, I was in wonderful company, so I had a great time despite the film.
Here are a few things that stood out to me...
Hey, Kristen. How much did you make on the last two movies? According to my good friends at Wikipedia, the series has grossed 1.8 BILLION dollars. I realize you don't get all of that money, but a mere .1% of the total income gives you 1.8 million. That's a lot of cash money. So, don't you think you could buy a $1 box of dental floss? The plaque buildup between your teeth has resulted in some noticeable staining. And don't vampires rely on their teeth to do whatever it is that they do? Dental hygiene is a big deal, and if you want those chompers much longer, you better start practicing it.
Now, I don't want to spoil anything for you readers out there who haven't seen the movie and who are actually interested in it for more than an afternoon out of the house. However, I do have to point out one part of the movie that made me giggle. When all of the werewolves were in the screaming match at the lumberyard, the scene reminded me of an old Power Rangers episode but with better special effects. The dogs were growling and talking in human voices at the same time. That was impressive and confusing. I spent the majority of the scene trying to figure out how many sets of vocal cords those miraculous beasts have to multitask like that. I was just waiting for all of the dogs to morph into one growling, talking werewolf that would battle Rita Repulsa's alien army.
Like I said before, I didn't go into this movie with high hopes. I didn't jump on the bandwagon when the books were a hit, and I didn't jump on the bandwagon when the movies took over the world. I saw the second one just to see the shirtless boy with the tattoo, and I saw this one so I could hang out with some friends. All in all, it was a great way to spend the afternoon.
Oh, and if you want to see another blogger's take on the movie, here's a link to Jen Lancaster's blog.
http://www.jennsylvania.com/jennsylvania/2011/11/breaking-dawn-otherwise-known-as-a-ride-in-edwards-volvo.html
Here are a few things that stood out to me...
Hey, Kristen. How much did you make on the last two movies? According to my good friends at Wikipedia, the series has grossed 1.8 BILLION dollars. I realize you don't get all of that money, but a mere .1% of the total income gives you 1.8 million. That's a lot of cash money. So, don't you think you could buy a $1 box of dental floss? The plaque buildup between your teeth has resulted in some noticeable staining. And don't vampires rely on their teeth to do whatever it is that they do? Dental hygiene is a big deal, and if you want those chompers much longer, you better start practicing it.
Now, I don't want to spoil anything for you readers out there who haven't seen the movie and who are actually interested in it for more than an afternoon out of the house. However, I do have to point out one part of the movie that made me giggle. When all of the werewolves were in the screaming match at the lumberyard, the scene reminded me of an old Power Rangers episode but with better special effects. The dogs were growling and talking in human voices at the same time. That was impressive and confusing. I spent the majority of the scene trying to figure out how many sets of vocal cords those miraculous beasts have to multitask like that. I was just waiting for all of the dogs to morph into one growling, talking werewolf that would battle Rita Repulsa's alien army.
Like I said before, I didn't go into this movie with high hopes. I didn't jump on the bandwagon when the books were a hit, and I didn't jump on the bandwagon when the movies took over the world. I saw the second one just to see the shirtless boy with the tattoo, and I saw this one so I could hang out with some friends. All in all, it was a great way to spend the afternoon.
Oh, and if you want to see another blogger's take on the movie, here's a link to Jen Lancaster's blog.
http://www.jennsylvania.com/jennsylvania/2011/11/breaking-dawn-otherwise-known-as-a-ride-in-edwards-volvo.html
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Freedom
Yeah, kids! I'm free! No more slaving in the classroom or kickin' it in the library. I get two weeks of freedom. That's 14 days of unconstrained, literary genius.
I realize it's been way too long since my last addition to the interweb world, so I'm going to make up for lost time. I'm not promising a post every single day of the holiday, but I do promise at least three.
So, hide your kids. Hide your wife. 'Cause I'm snatchin' up errbody's sadness this Turkey Day.
I realize it's been way too long since my last addition to the interweb world, so I'm going to make up for lost time. I'm not promising a post every single day of the holiday, but I do promise at least three.
So, hide your kids. Hide your wife. 'Cause I'm snatchin' up errbody's sadness this Turkey Day.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Itawamba Blackout
For almost half an hour, the Greater Fulton Area experienced a blackout this evening. Now, I have read on someone's Facebook status that this blackout was caused by a raccoon getting into something at the power station. Whether or not that is true, I'll never know, but it sure makes Fulton sound like a happenin' place!
When the modern conveniences of the 21st century are compromised by a power failure, what am I to do? Being trapped in my newly renovated cave with my laptop and no internet connection, I felt helpless. At that exact instant in time, I thought to myself, "Gosh, you should have made yourself watch that documentary on the Amish this summer. But, NO! You had to watch The Incredible Human Body...again. Now you'll never know how to survive in this world without electricity or modern machinery."
I couldn't watch tv. I couldn't creep on Facebook or Twitter. I couldn't do homework (not because of the blackout--I just didn't want to do it.) My whole body felt like my hands when I take a picture--where do I go and what do I do?
We live way out in the sticks, and our section of power line is often forgotten when the Tombigbee Electric Power Association fixes the problem. So, the McLeod household has been plagued by power failures many times in my life. We usually light all of the candles and kerosene lanterns in the house, grab a book or board game, and commune in the living room for some family bonding time. It's always a nice retreat from the hustle and bustle of this technologically crazed world, of which I am extremely dependent.
I'm using this blog as an avenue to find out what other people do when they're forced to step away from TV and computers.
Please comment and share your activities! Mom and I have almost memorized all the Taboo and Mad Gab cards, so we need new ideas for our "Blackout Parties"!
When the modern conveniences of the 21st century are compromised by a power failure, what am I to do? Being trapped in my newly renovated cave with my laptop and no internet connection, I felt helpless. At that exact instant in time, I thought to myself, "Gosh, you should have made yourself watch that documentary on the Amish this summer. But, NO! You had to watch The Incredible Human Body...again. Now you'll never know how to survive in this world without electricity or modern machinery."
I couldn't watch tv. I couldn't creep on Facebook or Twitter. I couldn't do homework (not because of the blackout--I just didn't want to do it.) My whole body felt like my hands when I take a picture--where do I go and what do I do?
We live way out in the sticks, and our section of power line is often forgotten when the Tombigbee Electric Power Association fixes the problem. So, the McLeod household has been plagued by power failures many times in my life. We usually light all of the candles and kerosene lanterns in the house, grab a book or board game, and commune in the living room for some family bonding time. It's always a nice retreat from the hustle and bustle of this technologically crazed world, of which I am extremely dependent.
I'm using this blog as an avenue to find out what other people do when they're forced to step away from TV and computers.
Please comment and share your activities! Mom and I have almost memorized all the Taboo and Mad Gab cards, so we need new ideas for our "Blackout Parties"!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
I'm Not A Boy
Every girl has had an experience in life that has had a distinct impact on her character, an experience that led her to find out who she really is.
When I was younger, I was a competitive gymnast. I practically lived in the gym, and my life revolved around gymnastics. I didn't want to deal with my hair flopping all around and having to re-do my ponytail every 45 seconds, so I got my hair cut off pretty short. And by pretty short, I mean it was like a boy's haircut.
To be paired with my boy hairstyle, I had the "tom boy" attitude. I rocked shorts and a t-shirt (which I still rock...). I played sports with boys; I wrested with boys. I didn't want to be treated any differently because of my anatomy, so I didn't act like I was any different.
With all this being said, here's my story.
Picture it: Fulton Grammar School, 1999. I was in Judy Spencer's third grade class. There was a new student in our grade, but I can't really remember if she was in my class or not, but it makes no difference to the outcome of the story. I will leave her name out of this, but we'll call her "Jane".
Jane was a really outgoing, talkative young lady. She tried really hard to fit in, but with Fulton being a small town, it was really hard for her to click with the majority of her classmates.
My first interaction with Jane was in the girls' bathroom. I had just finished my business and was at the sink washing my hands. Jane emerged from her stall as I was reaching for the paper towel. She says, "Excuse me. The boys' bathroom is across the hall!" I responded, "I'm not a boy," and went back to the room and held in my tears until I could get home.
Because of my upper-front quadrant, I am no longer accused of being a boy. However, because of my shoes, clothing, and over-all appearance, I am accused of being a lesbian.
I am neither.
When I was younger, I was a competitive gymnast. I practically lived in the gym, and my life revolved around gymnastics. I didn't want to deal with my hair flopping all around and having to re-do my ponytail every 45 seconds, so I got my hair cut off pretty short. And by pretty short, I mean it was like a boy's haircut.
To be paired with my boy hairstyle, I had the "tom boy" attitude. I rocked shorts and a t-shirt (which I still rock...). I played sports with boys; I wrested with boys. I didn't want to be treated any differently because of my anatomy, so I didn't act like I was any different.
With all this being said, here's my story.
Picture it: Fulton Grammar School, 1999. I was in Judy Spencer's third grade class. There was a new student in our grade, but I can't really remember if she was in my class or not, but it makes no difference to the outcome of the story. I will leave her name out of this, but we'll call her "Jane".
Jane was a really outgoing, talkative young lady. She tried really hard to fit in, but with Fulton being a small town, it was really hard for her to click with the majority of her classmates.
My first interaction with Jane was in the girls' bathroom. I had just finished my business and was at the sink washing my hands. Jane emerged from her stall as I was reaching for the paper towel. She says, "Excuse me. The boys' bathroom is across the hall!" I responded, "I'm not a boy," and went back to the room and held in my tears until I could get home.
Because of my upper-front quadrant, I am no longer accused of being a boy. However, because of my shoes, clothing, and over-all appearance, I am accused of being a lesbian.
I am neither.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Art of Attraction
In my 21 years of life, I've been able to snag one good boyfriend, two homosexuals, and a few other suitors. This qualifies me as an expert in the art of attraction, and today, I will share my three tools of the trade.
1. Dress not to impress.
Genuinely do not care what you look like. When you get up in the mornings, don't brush your hair. Just leave it in the ponytail that you went to bed with it in. Throw on some gym clothes regardless if you're going to the gym or not. The spirit of apathy that is evident in your appearance will attract some high class folks. Trust me--I'm a pro.
2. Only talk in movie quotes.
Okay, this one isn't true. You can also speak in song lyrics and television quotes. Let no original line slip from your lips. This will lead to many awkward laughs and "I don't get it"s, which are key elements in attraction.
3. Never initiate a conversation.
Always wait for the other person to speak. Only speak when spoken to. This makes you seem mysterious and challenging, especially paired with point #2.
These are simple steps to follow, but they work very effectively. Enjoy!
1. Dress not to impress.
Genuinely do not care what you look like. When you get up in the mornings, don't brush your hair. Just leave it in the ponytail that you went to bed with it in. Throw on some gym clothes regardless if you're going to the gym or not. The spirit of apathy that is evident in your appearance will attract some high class folks. Trust me--I'm a pro.
2. Only talk in movie quotes.
Okay, this one isn't true. You can also speak in song lyrics and television quotes. Let no original line slip from your lips. This will lead to many awkward laughs and "I don't get it"s, which are key elements in attraction.
3. Never initiate a conversation.
Always wait for the other person to speak. Only speak when spoken to. This makes you seem mysterious and challenging, especially paired with point #2.
These are simple steps to follow, but they work very effectively. Enjoy!
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